February 28, 2012

In Today’s News: Kentucky citizens pray for prayer breakfast to continue. Fertility defines everyone Hilter’s genocide and abortion are the same thing. Snowe falls… Wait, who? Thinking and discussion are far too offensive for county buses. Arizona’s immigration troubles… Solved! Bada Bing! John Mayer is coming back to Phoenix! Advertisements

February 27, 2012

In Today’s News: Kids need a storyline to exercise. School shooting devastates. Punishment no longer fits the crimes. Santorum blames Google instead of Dan Savage for the amalgamation of his name and santorum. WikiLeaks posts leak. Cancer patients are happier than the obese. Money buys unethical behavior.

February 23, 2012

In Today’s News: Yreka gold bandits predicted to make a killing. In conjunction with beer goggles, Google Glasses won’t let you forget yesterday’s one-night-stand. We will all be three feet tall – you know like Moses was. Surgeons required to take BAC test before operating. Ignoring friends for your significant other is damaging to your … Continue reading

February 22, 2012

In Today’s News: Solving crimes takes over 22 years. NASCAR drivers play with green gas to make up for fan’s gas. Google fights for a free internet but takes away privacy from users. Traffic accidents scheduled to rise with new glasses. Facebook is the new HR Department. … Then I read about the eight year … Continue reading

February 21, 2012

In Today’s News (Arizona Edition): Men are so intolerant to a woman’s sexual prowess it’s the next defense for terrorists. Gun laws are working out in Arizona’s best interest. Flying spaghetti monster gets a whole new meaning. Elective bible course at high schools soon to teach FSM and IPU chapters.

February 20, 2012

In Today’s News: My county Sheriff is gay… So? Whether is fighting for a job or fighting for their rights women have less time to devote to the bedroom. Ohio police are staying busy; first dead bodies then skeletons of old dead body. DARPA expects to turn James Cameron’s vision into a reality or Jonathan … Continue reading

February 16, 2012

In Today’s News: First Washington now New Jersey equal rights are spreading like wildflowers. E-Cigarettes are proven just as bad for your health. Prisoners are getting out everywhere. The broken record continues to play. Violence continues to spread in the Third World. McGraw Hill fears new competition and students rejoice in cheaper acquisition. I’m a … Continue reading

February 15, 2012

In Today’s News: Legalizing drugs won’t prevent abuse (well played). If you’re looking for a man try Google+. Alaska and Europe will reach a new business agreement but the US still suffers. No one and everyone seem to know how to budget tax dollars. Libyan protesters are really tyrants rebelling against nature to be controlled … Continue reading

February 14, 2012

In Today’s News: As bullying continues outside of school grounds so will the punishments. Arizona is taking less time to catch up to California – in some matters. Regretting that blind date afterward comes at less of a risk. Valentine’s Day is not the only thing sneaking up on men today. If you don’t escape … Continue reading

February 13, 2012

In Today’s News: Law & Order: SVU is not real, shocker! Time to start uploading all those email forwards you get about Obama so someone can finally tell you it’s wrong! The truth campaign should have started 4 years ago. Jailbaiters are uniting. It only took 11 years, but we are finally starting to care … Continue reading